Dads and Daughters and Sexism

This isn’t the sort of thing i’d normally blog about, its not work related, its about something important 🙂

But its been on my mind for a while so i thought i’d put it out there, primarily to get it off my mind.

As the Dad of a daughter I’ve been thinking a lot recently about things that will impact her life as she grows up and what I can do as a Dad to protect her and/or remove impediments to her happiness, the one that i keep returning to and thinking about is Sexism.

Why sexism? Well, recent stuff like:

  • The ongoing Lord Rennard debacle
  • The horrendous stuff that caroline criado-perez had to endure off the back of the campaign to get a woman’s face on the £10 note
  • Spend 5 minutes reading https://twitter.com/EverydaySexism (which often seems to depart from sexism into sexual assault and abuse)

But its not just these big obvious events that have got me thinking, often its the little implicit things that get my goat recent examples are:

  • (daughter dressed up in medical outfit) ‘Oh are you pretending to be a nurse?’ (Why not a doctor!?)
  • Family member: ‘I was going to buy [daughter] a book about rockets and space but thought, that is a boys book, so bought one about princesses instead’ (btw my daughter is currently mad about space and wants to be an astronaut)

OK, those two examples might be pretty lame in the grand scheme of things, but I guess i’m just stating the obvious that there are both the explicit and implicit forms of sexism.

Just like any parent I guess, I think my daughter is the most funny, clever, caring and insightful little person I know and possesses a boundless and energetic imagination with boundless potential.

I feel very strongly that its really important that, as a parent, I remove any possible constraint or impediment to that imagination and potential. So I’ve been pondering:

What can I do as a Dad of a daughter, or what can we (other Dads of daughters), collectively as Dad’s of daughters do together to help fight against sexism (in its implicit and explicit forms) to help make the world of our daughter’s future a better place to be the funny, clever, caring, strong women that they will grow into? 

Let me be clear though, I’m not a saint, I’ve been sexist in that concious post-modern/ironic way similar to when you tell an un-pc joke, except its not a joke and ironic sexism is still sexism just with added dickishness.

I’m mindful that in writing this post I’m probably still being sexist in that more implicit way by unconsciously reinforcing existing sexual stereotypes and disappearing up my own arse through some form of recursive sexism/patronising because i’m writing a post pondering how men can help women as if only men can help the damsel in distress

but i’m not, honest!

I feel passionately about my daughter being uninhibited by either explicit or explicit sexism in doing whatever she want with her life. If I had a son I’d feel exactly the same.

In my head at the moment I’ve just got this vague idea about would some sort of movement or collective, consistent action be a useful addition to existing efforts?

‘Dads Against Sexism’?

What do you think? please let me know.

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Never mind the Meta-bollocks: a rant about #entarch

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‘My framework/metamodel/ontology is better than your framework/metamodel/ontology’ 

‘Have we tailored our framework correctly?’

‘Is our reference architecture complete?’

‘That is not a capability that is a service!’

‘Is that a Service or a Capability, a Function or an Information System Service or an Actor’

‘Is this a logical application component or a logical technology component?’

‘I was going to model this as a logical application component but i want to relate it to an actor, so i have to wrap it up in an information system services then a business service.’

‘What would TOGAF do?’

‘Is this this Solution Concept diagram the right type of artifact? should it be a Business Footprint diagram?’

‘Are we progressing in line with our architecture maturity model?’

None of these questions matter!

Why?

because they don’t matter to your stakeholders

Why?

If you are really doing enterprise architecture and not detailed solutions/technology architecture (where accuracy of semantics is more important), then the stakeholders that matter, the ones whose decisions you provide support for simply don’t f-ing care!

EA is really just a technique to provide decision support, to help decision makers (oh by the way if you think you are one of them you are deluded) make informed decisions that affect the success of the Enterprise.

All we need to do as EAs to be successful is communicate clarity to your stakeholder about the problem space they are concerned about. To do this you don’t need to gnash your teeth or gaze at your navel, you don’t need a fancy tool and the right template connecting the right concepts in your chosen meta-model.

What you need is an understanding of the problem space, the status quo and what pragmatic steps may need to be taken to achieve the target.

To much EA debate, whether with colleagues or in the wider community is Meta-bollocks

Definiton: A conversation between Enterprise Architects that results in no value delivered to the organisation but an increase in air pressure and temperature due to the production of hot air.

When you engage in one of these meta-bollocks debates either with yourself or your colleagues, stop. Ask yourself, If my most important stakeholder was in the room at this moment, would she understand and would she think the discussion was an effective use of your time? if the answer is no, curtail the discussion and get on doing some Enterprise Architecture.

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Not All Change Is Transformational

 “Transformation” has become a highly overused, misused, and abused term. Many organizations seem to “transform” on a regular basis. We consultants are also guilty of overusing the term, partly because it represents some of the most interesting work we do, and partly because it is the rare company that can successfully pull off transformational change […]

Strategic use of business models: introduction

Times are tough: many businesses are struggling to stay afloat in the wild economic currents. Many organizations attempt to find a blue ocean of uncontested space, but lets face it: most of us are stuck in a red ocean with a lot of competition, growin…

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The future belongs to systems thinkers

I’ve often said the future belongs to the dot-connectors. Webber’s Rule of Thumb #7, the System is the Solution, describes it perfectly:

My point is that embedded in every company, in every organization, is a system. When you see the system and not just the individual pieces you increase your chances of winning.

Most people look at a company and see the organization chart. Or the pyramid of functions. Or the products and services the company offers as output.

Systems thinkers see the relationships, not the functions. They see the processes, not the stand-alone components or the final products. It’s the difference between looking at a fence and noticing the barbed wire running horizontally rather than the fence posts standing vertically.

Sometimes it helps to do something as simple as drawing a picture with arrows to show what would otherwise be invisible connections. A drawing of a three-legged stool isn’t a sophisticated operations chart, but it makes the point about how magazines need to operate as a system.

Systems thinking can also help when you’re trying to solve a perplexing problem. If you want to untangle the clues as to how something went wrong, think like a detective: figure out who all the players are and how they relate to each other. Usually it’s the system, not one person or department, that explains the real cause of the problem.

One thing is sure: the future belongs to systems thinkers.

For extra credit, see Rule #10 A Good Question Beats a Good Answer:

Why do questions matter more than answers? If you don’t ask the right question, it doesn’t matter what your answer is. And if you do ask the right question, no matter what your answer, you will learn something of value.

Questions are how we learn. Which means questions are how we create change…

Source: Webber, Alan M. (2009-04-10). Rules of Thumb (p. 32). HarperCollins. Kindle Edition.

Think Strategically, Proceed Practically

Knowing the strategic solution is only part of the challenge. Let’s assume you are able to establish the “right and just” solution either because your enterprise has well documented target architectures and roadmaps or your solution has a well established “best practice” pattern you can apply. Take a moment to savor your success, but only […]

6 Signs You Need a New IT Strategy

Guest post by Mike Pearl IT departments face crushing pressure from every direction to transform IT to meet the daunting demands of the digital age.  If you feel yourself asking questions related to IT’s role, better working relationships with Marketing, and how to capitalize on the firehose of emerging technologies, it is likely time for a new IT strategy. IT must institute massive change on multiple fronts: deepen and reshape business relationships, overhaul IT skills, […]